When Your Second Pregnancy is So Very Different to Your First

Sorry I have been largely absent on this blog for months. I've had computer issues, camera issues and morning sickness which ever so strangely was effected by Wifi... If I even tried to go on my laptop, the wireless signal would just make me so ill. It even meant I stayed off You Tube for a couple of months as people's background music had the same effect. I know.... odd!

As with Aaron, I knew I was pregnant within days of conception. I was in Ireland and just KNEW. The day I got back, we did the pregnancy test (on the day my time of the month was due; didn't even wait to be late) and got a VERY feint second line (on First Response), meaning Daddy went out and bought Digital Clear Blue so that we could get the answer in no uncertain terms, i.e. words! Very exciting and Aaron was there, so has known from the start :-) 

I don't know why I had First Response in the drawer as I should have remembered all of that feint second line business with Aaron too. So feint, you'd miss it, if you weren't as keen eyed as me. In fact I think it was a second from a 2-pack from Aaron, or, if due to the expiry date being 2016, if they don't last that long, perhaps I had bought a twin pack whilst we've been trying. Either way I came back from Ireland KNOWING I had one in the drawer.

So what's been so different 

about this pregnancy? 

Well pretty much everything really.

Morning sickness

With Aaron I didn't have ANY. With this baby, it kicked in week 6 and was with me till week 14. Very nauseous every day and had to eat 6 small meals a day.

Started showing so early on

I got pregnant in May, and was already showing at BritMums Live in June. This is me 12 weeks' pregnant:

CO2

The Midwife now does a C02 test, where you breathe into a tube at your booking on appointment. This is very new. I had the LOWEST rating, meaning not only am I not a smoker but I am also not subjecting myself to any pollution. Neither am I being exposed to any secondary smoke - passive smoking. I was thrilled with this. I missed all of the media outcry when this new test got launched but I have to say I disagree with the protests, that I have retrospectively found out about it. I did conscious pregnancy Yoga teacher training and we were shown the placenta of a smoker and a healthy one. Once you've seen that, you understand the importance of it and it becomes about baby's health and NOT your habit. People's only concern seemed to be that the Midwife would find out they were smoking even if they were lying that they weren't. Sorry, but this is a discussion you have to have with yourself: about the habit, about the baby, about the lies. Deflecting your frustration onto the test is just that - deflection.

Anti D

I am rhesus negative. When I was pregnant with Aaron it meant I had  to have an Anti D injection. This time, medical advances mean I was able to have a blood test to ascertain what blood type the baby was, depending on the results of this, I could escape the Anti D injection. Sadly, I do still have to have it, so I will be like a pin cushion by the end of this pregnancy but I am so glad they no longer just do it as routine. What was fascinating is that from my blood test, they isolate the baby's DNA and that was how they ascertained its blood type.

120 days

As a qualified Kundalini Yoga Teacher I celebrate 120 days from conception, which is the day that the soul comes in. With Aaron I had a party on this day. Not at all like a baby shower. I didn't receive gifts (other than my lovely boss paid for everyone's lunch) but I did give everyone a flower and we made a fuss of me and the new arrival. With this baby, I wasn't organised for this, but did take myself off for some quality time, for lunch, just me and bump. I made a fuss of Aaron after school too so that he could be part of it. He lit a candle with me and we had quality time watching an uninterrupted DVD together.

Midwife

It's been BEAUTIFUL that this time I am seeing the SAME Midwife at EVERY appointment. I really really appreciate that.

Less Hospital

My Anti D injection will be done at the Midwife's clinic and my Glucose Tolerance Test (due to my BMI) will be done at the GP's. With my last pregnancy BOTH of these had to be done at hospital, so this time it's great. Less car trips for Daddy or if he's at work, less bus fare as the other places are both within walking distance. My GTT with Aaron meant that I did NOT have gestational diabetes. I really hope and pray that is the case again this time.

20 Week Scan

The 20 week scan was so very different this time. Last time it was about 10 minutes and we saw Aaron's bits on display very early on, before the Sonographer even said "do you want to know?" whereas this time, the scan went on for closer to 30 minutes and she only casually asked at the very end "do you want to know?" and then couldn't establish the gender with certainty. What I can focus on though is how very detailed it was. Oh my goodness, she checked everything. The brain, the four chambers of the heart, the stomach, the femurs, the hands and arms, and so on. She even checked whether baby has a cleft lip oh and whether it has spina bifida. I don't remember any of this with Aaron. Either it wasn't as thorough back then, or the Sonographer just didn't talk us through it the way this one did. It was very reassuring the way she kept saying "oh beautiful" and "just perfect". Another difference is, we chose the name Aaron, the day of the 20 week scan, whereas this time, with not knowing, baby names weren't a topic of discussion that day. We'd need to choose a boy name but have had a girl's one for years.

Aspirin

I have been advised (I think due to age and BMI) to take aspirin every day, 75mg. This wasn't the case with Aaron. In order to write this blog post, I have just looked it up on Google and am quite alarmed by this:

It's best not to take aspirin during pregnancy, unless your doctor advises you to. The same goes for other non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs), such as ibuprofen, which have similar effects. Studies have shown that there may be problems for your baby if you take aspirin regularly in full adult doses:

Birth choice

With Aaron I was reading Spiritual Midwifery every day and booking Water Births etc... I was also a qualified and active Yoga Teacher, teaching every Friday evening after work. I did a Conscious Pregnancy course WHILST pregnant so that I could teach yoga to pregnant women (which I've never done despite being a teacher for 6 years and teaching till 38 weeks' pregnant). Anyway, I was in active labour with gas and air for 18 hours with Aaron and ended up having a C-section, due to the circumference of his head which means he was not descending. This time, the Consultant has already met me weeks ago, so as to make the decision and it means I already know I am having a section. So whereas with Aaron I went to 40 weeks + 8 days, this time, I won't be allowed to go beyond 39 weeks. I must say that neither my midwife nor the consultant put me under ANY pressure to have a VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section). He will meet me again on New Year's Day which is the meeting where the date will be decided and he will go through the risks/finer details. The appointment is then likely to be around the 20th Jan 2016. So I'll have a very pregnant Christmas with the gift of a baby soon after and before my birthday.

4d Scan

I was quite against extra scans with Aaron, so we did not have a 3 or 4d scan, although I did have a 3rd NHS one as I was "large for dates". This time, as the gender was inconclusive, we have booked a 4d scan. It'll be a huge novelty as you get lots of pics and a DVD and you get to see the face front on, instead of just a profile. I have read up on them and am personally assured that they are safe. Hopefully then I can do a gender reveal video :-)

Working

I was working full time, long hours, when pregnant with Aaron. This time I am a stay at home Mum and it's all very different. Hopefully the rest I get from not working is helping me cope with being pregnant at 42 ;-)

Age

I was only 36 for most of my pregnancy with Aaron whereas this time I am 42. Normally I would say that this hasn't adversely effected me at all, but I have just had gastroenteritis for the past 5 days, so it is probably not the best day for me to positively comment on this. I recently read on a Facebook page that someone laughs whenever they see a 40+ Mum and laughs even more the more over 40 they are. She was talking about accidentally pregnant Mums, but as with Aaron this pregnancy was very much planned, as previous blog posts from the New Year clearly show.

Mum already 

Of course this time I am a Mum already, so I have to be even more protective of my bump. I have carried Aaron a few times, but very rarely as I am being cautious and careful. I am so grateful that he is 5 and not younger, as this wouldn't be a choice I could make if he was a lot younger. It means I am looking after him as well as me, bump and Daddy so it's all very different, but in a good way. He's very much part of the journey and very excited. I was an only child, but Aaron has ALWAYS wanted a sibling. He doesn't even mind either way, boy or girl and is always telling me what he will let Pickle play with.

I am sure I will think of more things that are different about this pregnancy but for now, that's it.

Lots of love, Liska xx